Falling Apart
by catey123
Summary: post 816 Revolution followup. Zach realizes he has feelings for Megan, the question is, does she for him?


Megan wondered why Zach has turned up on her doorstep. She'd been sitting having a cup of tea, having gotten the baby down to sleep. She's exhausted, being a mom takes a lot out of her. Still, she loves what she's doing, loves her child, even if the circumstances aren't perfect. When the door rings, she's startled, not expecting anyone. Her sister hadn't been over in a couple of days, her mom would have phoned if she was coming. Getting out of her chair, she peeped through the hole and was surprised to see Zach standing there. She opened the door.

"Zach, what are you doing here? Kind of late for a visit, isn't it?" She doesn't know what to think. He came to see her once in the hospital, he's kind of avoided her since then. That bothered her, but it's not like she was his girlfriend.

"Can I come in Megan?" He looks so tired, so defeated, she can't help but worry about him.

"Of course, Zach." She stands back, allowing him entrance into the apartment.

"How's Margot? Where is she?" he questions her, looking around.

"She's sleeping. Finally got her settled in. She won't want to feed for a few hours."

"Oh, yes. Life revolves around her now, doesn't it?"

Stung, Megan glared at him. "She's two weeks old and helpless, Zach. What, did you expect her to come out fully formed and functioning? You know how it goes."

Realizing his thoughtlessness, Zach apologized. "I'm sorry, Megan, of course she comes first."

"What's wrong, Zach? Why did you come here?"

"Bad day at work. I've been walking for hours, thinking. And I realized I needed to see you."

Curious, she listened to him closely.

"I miss you being my partner. Eames is fine, but she's not you."

"Good to know I'm missed, Zach. Some days I wonder if you even realize you have a partner."

"Well, that comes from focusing on myself so much. I do realize I have a partner and a great one at that. I don't know if I've ever told you that. But things that happened today made me realize I need to be telling you this."

"What happened today?"

"Did Alex not phone and tell you?"

"Haven't heard from anyone. Haven't watched the news either."

"Ah, we've had a few terrorist like attacks the last few days. A couple of revolutionaries trying to damage the banking system. We caught the one, but the other, his daughter, she took hostages in a bank. Was going to blow them up. She'd just decided to surrender, and SWAT shot her. She was dead before I even caught her."

"You went in again without a gun, didn't you? What are you trying to prove by doing that? You could have gotten yourself killed."

"Don't lecture me right now, Megan. I can't deal with it. I know I can be reckless. But right now, I've been walking and thinking, and it's beginning to drive me crazy. All this kind of put things in perspective. And one of them being, I need to be around you Megan." he finished, embarrassed to admit that he needed her.

Megan looked at him in disbelief. She'd felt an attraction to Zach for months, but put it on the back burner, not wanting to acknowledge it. He was a trouble that she wasn't sure she needed at this point in her life, but she was intrigued by him. Him admitting to her that he needed her in any way at all warmed her deeply.

"You're just saying that cause of what happened today. Made you fear your own mortality." Megan tried to dismiss it.

"No, it's not that. When you finally figure out what it is you want, who it is you want, you want them to know that. Everything became clear this afternoon. I wasn't expecting this, Megan, I can't expect anything from you. But I wanted you to know that I do need to be near you."

Megan's draw dropped, listening to Zach's admissions. It was the last thing she'd expected to hear from him. "I don't know what to say Zach. I really don't."

"You can say you want me too."

Megan studied his deep brown eyes. They were totally sincere, she could tell that. She broke eye contact with him, standing up. She really didn't know how to deal with this. If Zach thought his world had been turned upside down by all that had occurred, his simple admission had thrown her for a loop. She stood and looked out the window, not knowing what to say. Yes, she'd like to explore things between the two of them. She'd like that very much. But she didn't want what had happened to him to be the basis for everything between them. Eventually, when the shock wore off, what if this wasn't what he wanted? What if she was a lifeline to cling to temporarily, til he got over whatever was bothering him? She couldn't bear to think of being used and left once again. Not now.

"Give me some time, Zach. This has kind of come out of the blue. I don't know yet. I've got Margot to think about now. Responsibilities."

"Well, you know me, never was good with responsibilities. That's why I've never had children. I'm kind of undependable, and need adult supervision myself." he said sarcastically.

"Eames told you I said that, didn't she? Give me some credit, Zach, I was in labor when I said it. At least I wasn't cursing you out like I was someone else." he looked at her, knowing she was referring to her ex.

"She may have mentioned it. And you're right. You've done a wonderful job of looking out for me. All I'm asking is that you look after me now. I'm not asking for much, Megan. Just a hug right now would do."

Zach followed her over to where she stood by her window, looking out on the street below. He enveloped her waist from behind, pulling her close to him. She started, trembling at his touch, how intimate the embrace was. She turned to face him, wrapping him in a hug, her face buried somewhere deep in his chest, he was so much taller than her. But given his size, it was the smaller woman who was taking care of him. She held on to him, barely holding on to her emotions. He was getting into her head, no matter how she tried to keep him out. He was falling apart, and all she did want to do was take care of him. She heard his heart beating rapidly, and held him for all it was worth.

"It's okay, Zach. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

He rested his chin on her head, arms clasped tight around her. For the first time since the incident, the numbness within him started to fade. They had no idea how long they stood there, just supporting one another. They only parted when the phone rang. It was Alex, phoning to let Megan know what had happened that day, and whether she'd seen Zach, as he'd disappeared after work, and no one could seem to get hold of him. Megan glanced at Zach, debating whether to tell Alex that he was fine, standing in her living room. She compromised, saying she'd phone Alex if she heard from Zach, but was sure he was fine. She'd do it later, she thought to herself, not ready to let the world know where Zach was.

"Alex? I suppose the department is looking for me. I left my phone in my locker. After today, I really do not need to talk to anyone there or from the FBI. They can talk to me tomorrow."

"I'll let Alex know you're okay afterwards. For now, why don't you rest on my couch. You look beat, Zach."

"I am beat. And Megan? Thanks."

She smiled at him, watching him lay down. She grabbed a throw off the back of her chair, and covered him up. He smirked at her.

"Got this mom thing down pat already, don't ya?"

"Zach, I learned from the best. Now, get some rest, and we'll talk later." She stroked his cheek gently, reveling in the fact that she could touch him like this, and he wanted her to. She was happy that he hadn't shut her out, instead, he'd opened up, admitted that he'd wanted her. Tonight was a good night, was all she thought, as she dimmed the lights, leaving him to fall asleep on her couch. A very good night, she thought.


End file.
